[League Update] Week 2: "You play to win the game!" - Not Ron Rivera

*Note: In an effort to make this blog more than just my soapbox, send me anything you'd like to see added to the weekly post: a rant, gloating, trash talk, you name it. Send it to me on Twitter, in an email or in a text.

Like the Carolina Panthers, I am 0-2. Unlike Panthers coach Ron Rivera, I'm willing to admit something is wrong. Like the Panthers' coaching staff, no one is safe going into next week.

If this keeps up, I'm going to have to rename this blog "Diary of a sad fantasy football commissioner."



Joining me in the basement: Academic Probation, PerpetualMotionSquad (he's trying this time!) and The Reservoir Dogs.

Like the Chiefs (THE CHIEFS!!), the following teams are 2-0: iwishiwouldhaveplayedtuba, Chicks Dig Scars, Getting over the hump and Blaupunkt.

Speaking of iwishiwouldhaveplayedtuba: Who knew that getting Michael Vick in the autopick draft was going to be a good thing? Guy has the third highest point total of all QBs after two weeks. And iwishyouwouldhavepickedashortername has the highest cumulative "points for" score so far. Well played, sir.

A large part of that "points for" number came in Week 2, when he scored a league-high 133.22 points. Shout out to Muscular Mathletes for scoring 121.16 points after finishing dead last in Week 1. (Yes, she did make me put that in.)

Week 2's Sad Trombone Award goes to Dolphins of Old, who tumbled from his perch, scoring just 59.44 points in Week 2 after having the highest Week 1 score.

Now it's time for TWEET OF THE WEEK! (Y'all got to give me better options. See the top of this post.)

@RoyaleWCheeseFB I'm 2-0 and haven't scored over 100.... Even with Kaepernick scoring >10 PTA last night, and I have GIO!
— Matthew Parunak (@Mattpar14) September 18, 2013

Because of that, Blaupunkt, I'm awarding you this week's You Got Lucky award for having the lowest "points for" number of the 2-0 teams.

(Did I just use this as an excuse to play some Daft Punk? YUP.)

Blaupunkt didn't have the lowest winning score of Week 2, though. That goes to Something with 82.48 points.

This week's Thursday night game: Kansas City Chiefs at Philadelphia Eagles. If you have players on those teams, decide to play them or sit them by kick on Thursday. Set everything else by kick on Sunday. Or don't, especially if your name is Matt.

Wishing you sure hands and strong ACLs,

Corey