[League Update] Week 13: Manning to Decker, Manning to Decker, ManningtoDecker MANNINGTODECKER!

If the season ended right now, here's how the playoffs would look:

Championship

1.  Muscular Mathletes -- 10-3 (1,292 points for)
2. Jeff Fisher's Mullet -- 8-5 (1,201 pf)
3. Getting over the hump -- 8-5 (1,145 pf)
4. Academic Probation -- 7-6 (1,234 pf)

Consolation

1. iwishiwouldhaveplayedtuba -- 7-6 (1,228 pf)
2. Correctamundo -- 7-6 (1,214 pf)
3. The Reservoir Dogs -- 7-6 (1,191 pf)
4. Cant Be That Hard -- 7-6 (1,168 pf)

On the bubble

• Dolphins of Old -- 6-7 (1,059 pf)
• Big Kahuna Burger -- 6-7 (1,058 pf)

No chance

• Chicks Dig Scars -- 5-8 (1,041 pf)
• Blaupunkt -- 5-8 (998 pf)
• PerpetualMotionSquad -- 4-9 (1,013 pf)
• Something -- 4-9 (1,002 pf)

Let's take a closer look at these groups. 

1) The Muscular Mathletes are the only team that has clinched a championship playoff spot going into Week 14, the final week of the regular season. They did it with a huge 129-105 win over Correctamundo, thanks to Cam Newton (27 points), Alshon Jeffery (36) and the Detroit Lions defense (22). 

Jeff Fisher's Mullet and Getting over the hump are tied for second place at 8-5 after both won in Week 13. As best as I can tell, those two teams have clinched at least an appearance in the consolation playoffs. 

Academic Probation is one of five teams tied at 7-5, but gets the final championship playoff spot because of the "Points for" tiebreak. The team has won three games in a row to get in this position. 

2) The difference one game can make. Correctamundo came into Week 13 tied for second but dropped out of the top four after a loss to the Mathletes. 

Only one of these four teams -- The Reservoir Dogs -- won its last game. tubas took a loss to Big Kahuna Burger and Cant be that hard learned just how hard it can be against the Mullets (much, much more on that later). 

I like that all of the teams tied at 7-6 are in right now. I hope it works out in a similar way after next week. I'd hate to see a team miss the playoffs based on "Points for." But it could happen. These four teams are in a precarious position with two teams just one game behind them on the bubble. 

3) Winning is crucial for Big Kahuna Burger and Dolphins of Old. 

BKB is on a roll as of late with three straight wins. Getting a fourth straight won't be easy. BKB faces the Mathletes in the season finale. But BKB did come out on top 121-56 when these two teams met in the season opener. 

The Dolphins have had a roller coaster season, never winning more than two games in a row. They lost their last game to 93-78 to PMS. They'll face the Mullets in the season finale. The Dolphins beat the Mullets 124-122 in the season opener. 

4) Chicks Dig Scars has had one of the worst collapses I can remember in this league. The team was alone in first place early this season, but has since lost seven straight games, falling out of a chance at the playoffs. 

Blaupunkt is the defending league champion and started the season 2-0, but has since lost eight of its last 11. It's easy to see why: Blaupunkt is the only team that hasn't scored at least 1,000 points this season. 

I really thought PMS would break through this year. Its owner knows how to play, he seemed excited, but something kept holding him back. PMS started 1-8 and never really recovered, even though it has won three of its last four games. 

And then there's Something. Something has lost five straight games, all by at least 19 points. And this is the team owned by the guy who said on Facebook we should get rid of some of the dead weight in the league and that he always set his lineup (he didn't). 

So there you have it. There's a lot on the line in this final week. With fantasy implications and the Panthers playing the Saints Sunday night, my stress level will be very high this weekend. 

Now for the awards! 

I'm sure you expected me to brag at the top of this post. I wanted to, really. But I held back. Until now. WOOOOOOO!! Peyton Manning to Eric Decker not once, not twice, not three times, but FOUR TIMES for touchdowns.

Just one of the beautiful throws ... and catches.

Courtney and I were actually in the car on the way back from Cary during the game and I had her checking the score. Every time she did, Decker had scored another touchdown and I did a little dance. By the fourth, I was bouncing up and down and giggling like a maniac. Then Steven Jackson had a 20-point game with two touchdowns. It was just glorious. 

All that is to say that my 133 points was the highest this week, barely beating the Mathletes. 

That brings me to TWEET(s) OF THE WEEK: The one where Morgan tries to get me to trash talk and then gets mad when I do. 

This week's Sad Trombone goes to Something, which continued its slide down the standings with a 59 point showing in Week 13.

And the next to last You Got Lucky Award goes to Getting over the hump, which had the lowest winning score (86) in Week 13 and was lucky enough to play Something.


This week's Thursday night game is between the Texans and Jaguars. Figure out what you want to do with those players before Thursday night.

No teams are on a bye in Week 14. (Hooray!) Make sure you set the rest of your lineup by Sunday. This is not the week to forget!

Wishing you sure hands and strong ACLs,

Corey